I read in a book that most people make more of an effort with their job search than they do with a mate search and I believe it. As children girls are read Cinderella and Snow White. Fairy tales that teach us if we work hard enough or even if we make mistakes the Prince will come and we will live happily ever after.
There was never a sequel… Cinderella II after the divorce where she has to go to family maintenance to get the Prince to pay child support or what to do if the Prince was caught messing around with Sleeping Beauty. Where Cinderella goes back to school gets her business administration degree and opens her own janitorial company contracting to all the highrises downtown then meets a new Prince who has real estate holdings, cash in the bank and a penthouse condo in English Bay. A book that mothers read their little girls to prepare them for the real world. That would be just too cruel. We all want our children to live happily ever after.
My friends and I talk about relationships quite a bit. What was wrong with our last relationship, what we seem to be attracted to and what works for us relationship wise. We counsel each other and talk so that we can do better next time. When next time comes around.
All my friends agree that I spend a lot of time at home. I feel safe here in my place and I have my little dog. This is my haven. intellectually, I understand that the likelihood of someone coming to my home and asking me out for coffee or on a date is slim to none.
This year, I have made a committment that I am going to get out more to meet people and make myself available to the process. If finding a lovely man to spend time with or create a relationship with is like finding a needle in a haystack, I had better map out the haystacks I am going to search plus get off my farm and check the other farms for haystacks.
I do believe that love is out there, and I do remember what it feels like to be in love and know that “matchmatically” there is someone out there who is looking for me too.